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When I walked into my first classroom in 2010 I was nervous, frazzled, and determined to make a difference in my students' lives. As I reflect on my past 6 years of teaching I am beyond thankful for the students who have touched my life and who have taught me so much, however what I think about most and what keeps me up at night, are the students I have lost.
The first step is admitting I have a problem...I am the teacher that loves the students most people wipe their hands of. In education, many times, teachers who have been in the career for a lifetime, often say "You can only help the ones who want the help". I am still fairly new to the teaching profession, and maybe one day I too will shrug my shoulders about the students who didn't want my help, however as of right now, that is not my stance.
Unlike most teachers, I am lucky to have small classes (5-12 students) and have learned how to connect with the most unloveable and often the most unmotivated students. The problem with this, is that despite getting to know these students, and show them an adult can see their potential, I am usually left wondering what happened to them and if what I tried to teach them ever made a difference. A few of my most challenging (aka favorite) students have either moved out of district or have done something to earn a new school placement, and despite my efforts to focus on the students I still have, my mind often wanders to what I could have done to better support the students I have lost.
As I read through this post, I am faced with a common theme not only in my teaching life, but in my whole life. As a student myself, I often gravitated toward my peers who often needed someone to believe in them, and despite being a "good kid" I often chose to care about people I felt were struggling, usually in regards to family life. As I think more deeply about my life I have noticed that I try to save people. Maybe I do this because I find joy in helping others... maybe it's because I crave the challenge... or maybe, just maybe... this is my purpose.
More often than not my heart physically hurts because I so desperately want to help those who have been dealt a nasty hand at life. Most of what I have learned in my short 6 years as a teacher is that most of the students who act out, are disrespectful, or are unmotivated, often do not feel valued. My mission is to make every student, child, or anyone for that matter feel valued.
If I can give new teachers a word of advice, it is this... DO NOT let other professionals muddy your determination to make a difference. Students come from a variety of backgrounds and until they feel valued, lasting changes in their behavior or choices will not happen. As Josh Shipp, the Teen-Whisperer stated, "All kids are just ONE caring adult away from becoming a success story".